In a fit of irony and role reversal, you have the headache.

Just in case you don't think Tim Tebow is a douchebag, here you go.

More of This Guy; Less of Rafalski

If you look at the picture really fast his thumb kind of looks like a ball sac.  That is all. 

Chelios in the lineup tonight; Brian Rafalski is out.  God help us all.   

Round 2: More Proof I Have No Idea What I'm Talking About

Before I get to round 2 predictions for the NHL, I'll cover a few random thoughts from round 1:

• The Sharks are soft.  There is no doubting this now, they'll need significant changes before they can challenge for a cup
• I don't put it all on Thorton, he's has every tool you could ever want in a hockey player but he's not going to be the guy, he needs someone to defer to.  
• Jeremy Roenick= HUGE FUCKING LOSER
• Columbus needs a top pair defense and a legit center before they are ready for prime time.  
• Most overrated player in the NHL? Alex Kovalev.  
• RJ Umberger is a fantastic playoff performer.  

Predictions:

Western Conference:

- Red Wings over Ducks in 5.

As a Wings fan, I'm not so worried about the Ducks even though they are pretty hot right now.  I am worried about Pronger putting a cheap shot on #5 or #13.  I also could fear a situation where Aaron Downey has to dress in this series.  I'm not sold on Jonas Hiller and in the end I still think this is the same undisciplined Ducks team that will blow it.  

-Canucks over Chicago in 6.

Chicago has looked better than I thought, they are close to contending.  However, Vancouver is in a nice situation here.  No one seems to be talking about them and they definitely have the experience and goaltending to win it.  They are a very good team.  

Eastern Conference:

- Boston over Carolina in 7.

Carolina runs out of gas here, but I'm not sure Boston is any better than a 2-round type team.  

-Pittsburgh over Washington in 7

Washington will get a boost from playing at home and coming back in that round one series.  I'm really starting to believe Pittsburgh's success depends upon their mental makeup... and it's only fair to question it.  

In Honor of the Impending Red Wings Win Tonight

RIP Mrs. Hockey.

Obligatory NBA Playoffs Post.

So I'm pretty sure the NBA playoffs start in something like 2 hours, I'm not really sure, is anybody?  Now, I'm sure the NBA's key demographic is more than anticipating this years playoffs, but allow me to preface the rest of what I write with this-- this is the worst season of NBA basketball I have witnessed in my entire life.  

I was going to expand on this quite a bit further, but I'll get bored, you'll get bored, and we'll just avoid it.  In summary, watching Lebron, D-Wade, or Kobe barrell into the lane during the 4th quarter, throw their body around with no regard while their teammates clear out the lane and stand idly around, is not an appealing style of basketball.  It's gotta be some pseduo-And 1 influence and in my holier than now opinion, is not incline with the true essence or spirit of the game.  

Oh how I yearn for the days of this:

Anyways, here is FRD's Worst Playoff Preview in History:  

Eastern Conference: 

Round 1

CLEV over DET in 6.  The Pistons have a little fight left in them to steal a couple of games, but soon we will be able to prove Joe Dumars has just been getting lucky for a couple of years, and the real credit for Pistons teams belongs to others.  

Celtics Over Bulls in 7.  I'm not sold we don't see KG again this playoff-season.  

Magic over 76ers in 5.  Jimmy Hayes will fail to notice.  

Heat over Hawks in 6.  You think the NBA is going to avoid a Lebron D-Wade matchup in the playoffs? C'mon.  

Round Two

Clev over Miami in 7- It goes 7.  That's right.  

Magic over Celtics in 6- The power of youth, or something like that.  

Conference Finals:

Magic over Cavs in 6-  Man in the league office going to be pissed.  Van Gundy is working his way into the all-time underrated coaches list.  

Western Conference:

Round One:

Lakers over Utah in 5- I like Utah, but it's not happening here.  

Denver over New Orleans in 5- Billups is the 3rd best point guard in the NBA.  Think about that.  

San Antonio over Dallas in 5-  I'm a Rick Carlisle guy, but probably not happening here.  

Portland over Houston in 7- I know he's not playing, but Tracy McGrady is approaching Peyton Manning levels of loserness.  

Round Two

Lakers over Portland in 7- The NBA going to work here for Kobe and Phil.  

Denver over San Antonio in 7- I can only name 4 active Spurs players.  

Conference Finals:  

Lakers over Denver in 5-  Did you know the weirdo who sits next to Jack Nicolson at Lakers games is actually the father of musician/reality loser/ douchebag extraordinaire, Cisco Alder?  

The Finals:  

Lakers over Magic in 6-  Mike Tyson won the heavyweight title after he served his sentence for rape, why not let Kobe?  

The Worst Playoff Preview in History

Chelios, The American Bad-Ass, Ari Gold, and The Canadian Bad-Ass?

The weather is starting to warm up, baseball is back, and Puxatony Phil is dead. That can only mean one thing....it's time for the Stanley Cup Playoffs.  Keeping with tradition here at FRD, I give you the worst playoff preview possible.....

Eastern Conference

Round 1

Boston v. Montreal

The Ambassador Detroit Browne: Predicted Winner:  Boston in 5.  

Flawed Reasoning:  This could be a tougher series for the B's, but I think Montreal is ready to turn it in already.  That and I don't believe any of the Cary Price hype.  Is he even their starting goalie anymore?  

Reverend Woodrow Morris: Predicted Winner: Boston in 4.

Flawed Reasoning: This Montreal team isn't good. Price is a solid goaltender, but in order for him to get hot and steal some games there has to be some semblance of a defense in front of him. Montreal doesn't have that.

Washington v. NYR

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Washington in 6

Flawed Reasoning:  The Rangers a feisty club, but probably don't have enough to hang here.  

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Washington in 7

Flawed Reasoning: I agree with the Ambassador here. I see the Rangers winning a few games, but clearly they do not have the talent to keep up with Washington. However, if the Rangers can win one of the first two in DC, I can honestly see them winning this series. Washington is a heavily flawed team yet people fail to realize these flaws because of Ovechkin. Remember, Jose Theodore is the goalie of this team and they rely too heavily on their power play. The idea of facing King Henrik in a long series should scare the shit out of Washington and their fans.

New Jersey v. Carolina

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Carolina in 7.  

Flawed Reasoning:  NJ is pretty cold right now and Carolina is pretty hot; however, I'm not sure that will manifest itself in this series.  The Devils are a better defensive club, and Brodeur will have the ability to steal some wins, but I see the Hurricanes pulling a small upset here in seven. 

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Carolina in 6.

Flawed Reasoning: This is a matchup of probably the hottest team in the NHL right now against one of the coldest. Over the last two months or so of the season no one has beaten this Carolina team, let alone four times in seven games. It is also a matchup of the two goalies most likely to get insanely hot and steal a series down the road. Personally, I like Cam Ward to do that over Brodeur. Maybe because Ward hasn't fucked his wife's sister yet. However, I don't think the Hurricanes are going to need Ward to be on acid to win this series. I think they're the better team especially over the second half of the season.

Philly v. Pittsburgh

D. Browne: Predicted Winner:  Pittsburgh in 7

Flawed Reasoning:  I expect this to be a pretty physical series, but ultimately the Pens having too much fire power.  

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Pittsburgh in 5

Flawed Reasoning: Apart from the Hurricanes, no team has been more impressive than the Penguins. Their performance over the latter part of the season to not only get into the playoffs, but to get home ice advantage in the first round is beyond impressive. One thing that is not impressive though is Philadelphia playing 5 on 5. This team is a power play and nothing else. Teams that rely on special teams do not succeed in the playoffs. The games are tighter and the opportunities just aren't there. Add to that the fact that while Philly is strong with the man advantage, they take more penalties than anyone else in the NHL so against strong teams their dominance 5 on 4 is negligible since they'll spend an equal amount of time killing off dumb penalties. Also, Martin Biron isn't good. He has weird eyes too.

Round 2.

Boston v. Carolina

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Bruins in 7

Flawed Reasoning: Two evenly matched teams in my opinion, Boston gets the nod because of home ice. 

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Bruins in 7

Flawed Reasoning: As much as I have liked the way that Carolina has played recently, I just think this Bruins team will be too much for them. Thomas has been unreal this year and should get consideration for MVP in my opinion, but there is no chance he'll finish top 3. I think the only way Carolina wins this series is if they can somehow turn it into a fast paced shootout, but with these two goalies the chances of that happening are pretty remote.

Washington v. Pittsburgh  

D. Browne: Predicted Winner:  Pittsburgh in 7. 

Flawed Reasoning:  The matchup the NHL wants.  I'll give the nod to the Pens here because I am not a believer in the Caps D and think they need another year of experience before they can make the jump.

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Pittsburgh in 6

Flawed Reasoning: Honestly, I think I'm being generous here giving Washington two wins. The key for this series, and all playoffs long for that matter, for the Penguins is going to be their third line of Matt Cooke, Jordan Staal and Tyler Kennedy. Everyone knows what the Crosby line and Malkin line is going to do for Pittsburgh. Washington has a talented group with Ovechkin's line. However, Washington has no answer for this third line. Hell, no one in the East does. It isn't even so much that this line has been scoring of late, it's how they can totally control the flow of a game. Some of their best shifts this season have been when they spend 1:30 in the offensive zone until Malkin or Crosby can come on and finish the job. This line has been great defensively as well. I wouldn't be surprised to see Bylsma match this line up with Ovechkin every so often to not only give Crosby a chance for a mismatch but also this line would suffocate Washington's top guns. Jordan Staal is going to win a Selke very, very soon. Most importantly, I just don't see how this Capitals team can expect to keep up with Pittsburgh. Ovie is going to get his goals but then what? Washington can't even win this series if they try and make it an up and down shootathon.

Conference Finals 

Boston v. Pittsburgh

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Pittsburgh in 6.

Flawed Reasoning:  Either team that makes it through to the point will pretty much be dead, so it could easily go either way.  Additionally, I hate picking Pittsburgh and think they are a heavily flaw team, but in this situation they have a little bit more experience and the stars to advance.  

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Pittsburgh in 7

Flawed Reasoning: Jesus, have we picked the same winners in every series so far? This really is a joke preview. Anyway, this will be an excellent series. I hope this happens. Both teams are strong five on five and in net and have the depth that it takes to win in the playoffs. But ultimately, I really like this Penguins team and they way they have been playing.

Western Conference

Round 1

San Jose v. Anaheim

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: San Jose in 6

Flawed Reasoning:  The Ducks have come on as of late, but the Sharks are too focused this year to choke it away in round one.

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: San Jose in 5

Flawed Reasoning: As much as I have liked the Ducks recently they got the short end of the stick here. This is going to be a hard nosed series, which one would think might play to Anaheim's advantage. Remember how Calgary almost beat San Jose by kicking the shit out of them every night last year? But, this San Jose team is good. Real good. Too much for Anaheim to handle in what turns out to be one of the better first round matchups even though I only see it going 5 games.

Detroit v. Columbus

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Detroit in 5

Flawed Reasoning:  Detroit has been playing lousy of late, but so has the CBJ.  Steven Mason getting hot here could be scary, but this is ultimately a leaning experience for Columbus, they just don't have the horses yet.  

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Detroit in 6

Flawed Reasoning:  If Mason decides to turn into Cam Ward circa 2005, Detroit goes home early. Actually, on second thought, this Blue Jackets team is eerily similar to that Hurricanes team that won it all. Just something to watch out for. But, I don't see the Blue Jackets pulling off this upset. As much as I would LOVE to see it. I also don't see this series ending in 5 because I have tickets to game 6 in Columbus and want to use them.

Vancouver v. St Louis

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Vancouver in 4.

Flawed Reasoning: It's a miracle the Blues are in the playoffs, let alone the 6-seed.  Too much travel here against too good of a team. The Canucks land the only first round sweep.

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Vancouver in 4.

Flawed Reasoning: The Blues are the great story of the NHL this season. That doesn't win hockey games.

Chicago v. Calgary

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: Calgary in 6

Flawed Reasoning:  Chicago is in a little over it's head in this matchup and better protect home ice if they want to have any chance.  In the end, Calgary has too much firepower in this one.  

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Chicago in 7

Flawed Reasoning: What a great series this is going to be. If this series took place a week and a half ago, I'd pick Calgary in 6 but they have fallen on hard times. Hell, they've been putting 15 skaters on the ice recently due to salary cap concerns. While that doesn't matter in the free of charge playoffs, I don't think this team is in the right place mentally to win a series. Calgary's first line is mean and Kipper getting hot is not only a legit possibility but probably the death knell for Chicago. I had Calgary going deep into the playoffs a few weeks ago, maybe even winning the West, but the way things have shaken out up there I just can't bring myself to do it any longer.

Round 2

D. Browne: San Jose v. Calgary

Predicted Winner: San Jose in 5

Flawed Reasoning:  Calgary is prone to defensive lapses and that will be deadly against the Sharks.  They just seemed to relaxed to get themselves into trouble this year.  

Detroit v. Vancouver

Predicted Winner: Vancouver in 7

Flawed Reasoning:  Vancouver is a tricky team in that they have a odd mix of talent and experience.  Luongo is the difference here in a back and forth seven-game series.  

W. Morris: San Jose v. Chicago

Predicted Winner: San Jose in 6

Flawed Reasoning: Chicago is good and will be good for a few years to come. Their defense is surprisingly strong and their blue line can move the puck with the best of them. However, the Calgary series is going to take something out of them. Anaheim is going to push San Jose around and try to out muscle them on a daily basis, but I see San Jose responding to that whereas I see Calgary and Chicago just playing balls out, dead tiring,  solid hockey for 7 games. This is the year San Jose breaks through the wall that is the second round.

Detroit v. Vancouver

Predicted Winner: Detroit in 6

Flawed Reasoning: This Red Wings team seriously baffles the shit out of me. The team as a whole has put up almost identical numbers to last year yet their goaltending is so much worse it's unreal. Detroit is immune to mediocre goaltending and it doesn't make any fucking sense. As much as I would like to pick Vancouver here and as good of a case I could make for that happening, Detroit will find a way to overcome the crap storm that is Osklin. 

Conference Finals

D. Browne: San Jose v. Vancouver

Predicted Winner:  San Jose in 5.  

Flawed Reasoning: They were the best team in the NHL for a reason.  Here they benefit from facing a tired Canucks squad.  

W. Morris: San Jose v. Detroit

Predicted Winner: San Jose in 7.

Flawed Reasoning: Another series that I really, really hope happens. If my predictions are right, which they won't be, we are in for a fucking treat with these conference finals. I've been high on this San Jose team all year long and I'm not going to jump off the bandwagon now. Not only do the Sharks tell Ron Wilson to suck it, but they win the West while doing it.

Stanley Cup Finals

San Jose v. Pittsburgh

D. Browne: Predicted Winner: San Jose in 4

Flawed Reasoning:  The Sharks are the most complete team in the NHL and will be a tough matchup for the Pens, assuming they don't self-destruct.  I can see the Pens being dead at this point because of their battle to get out of the east combined with their second half push, leaving them on the losing side of the finals again. 

W. Morris: Predicted Winner: Pittsburgh in 6

Flawed Reasoning: As much as I love this Sharks team, I love this Penguins team even more. Pens win the cup and I get to shit in the mouths of at least 6 people. 

Euro Trash Will Reign Supreme

Predicted Winner of The Masters: Paul Casey at -9.  

You're welcome.  

Gold Jacket, Green Jacket, Who Gives a Shit?

It's the week of the Masters, one of my personal favorites of the year.  I'm not sure any geographical location can look as attractive as Augusta National does in April.  Maybe that's cause I'm stuck in the Midwest and woke up to 8 inches of snow on April 4th.  

I'm also a bit of a sucker for all the tradition and etiquette of the tournament.  One of the most interesting parts of that tradition is Clifford Roberts, a guy you gotta respect for blowing his brains out on the actual course.  

Here's a little something to get you ready for "a tradition unlike any other."

A Rebirth: We're Talkin' Baseball

It's been a long time my FRD friends, too long.  So I've decided to bring this blog back--hopefully with an influx of original material-- for the time being.  I'll attempt to encourage the other FRD contributers to do the same, but we're clearly not a very proactive group.  

Anyways, the start of the baseball season is just around the corner and I figured I would keep with the FRD tradition of providing the worst season preview possible for the occasion.  Since everyone is doing a season preview these days I'll spice ours up a bit by going with a movie theme (meaning I'll compare each team to a movie.)  Enjoy.  

Edit:  You know what, fuck that movie theme stuff. I'm writing this at 5:30 AM with a two hours of Property staring me down in roughly 4 hours. My priorities are seriously out of order.

Edit #2: I guess I should disclose that I used to be a bit of a baseball stats geek and keep that in mind when looking at these predictions.  On the other hand, I used to collect baseball cards too 

AL East

1. Yankees
2. Red Sox-WC
3. Rays
4. Blue Jays
5. Orioles

AL Central

1. White Sox
2. Tigers
3. Royals (My biggest sleeper squad, I like their makeup)
4. Indians
5. Twins

AL West

1. Angels
2. Athletics
3. Rangers
4. Mariners

NL East

1. Mets
2. Braves-WC
3. Phillies
4. Marlins
5. Nationals

NL Central (Somehow I think this might be the best division in baseball now)

1. Astros
2. Cubs
3. Cardinals
4. Brewers
5. Reds
6. Pirates

NL West

1. Dodgers
2. D-Backs
3. Rockies
4. Padres
5. Giants

Playoffs--

Yankees over White Sox

Red Sox over Angels (Donnie Moore Curse in full effect)

Mets over Astros

Dodgers over Braves

-----------------------------------------

Red Sox over Yankees

Mets over Dodgers

__________________

World Series:  Mets over Red Sox.  

***Bonus***

Award Predictions--

AL MVP:  Carlos Quentin

NL MVP: Albert Pujols

AL Cy Young: Jon Lester

NL Cy Young: Johan Santana

AL ROY: Brett Anderson, Oakland

NL ROY: Cameron Maybin  

I leave you with this....

Top 10 Albums of 2008???

I compiled this list while sitting in a review session a week ago and Rev. Woodrow Morris suggested I post it here. It ain't going to be pretty cause I'm fitting it in on a break from finals (which are a lot more stressful than undergrad finals.)

This list is based on my opinion only and oddly has a strange indie dance music vide to it this year....

1)Vampire Weekend- Vampire Weekend: A lot people heard this stuff long before it actually was released in January 2008, but yeah technically it counts.

It’s smart, almost pretentiously smart, but it’s very, very good. Smart, simple pop songs. This album is made to listen to on sunny 80-degree days with no clouds in the sky.

For some reason it almost reminds me of Paul Simon, I don’t know why.


2) M83- Saturday = Youth: It sounds like the 80s, you can’t deny it, but it’s good. Every song has a different vibe, but they are all very catchy. Kind of has a movie score feel to it.



3) Bon Iver- For Emma, Forever ago: Sort of the antithesis to Vampire Weekend in my mind. What I imagine Iron and Wine would sound like if he was still getting critical acclaim and showed signs of passion once in awhile.

a sorta cool a capella thing they did below

4) Tokyo Police Club- Elephant Shell: One of the more traditional bands to make my top 10, although that’s debatable. Much like Vampire Weekend most of these songs leaked long before they were actually released.

It hasn’t held up as well after multiple listens, but it’s a rock solid album with a DIY vibe that I’ve always enjoyed.



5) Fleet Foxes- Fleet Foxes: At first I didn’t get this stuff, I didn’t dislike it, but I didn’t see where it was going. It took me having to listen to the album to get it. I don’t know how to describe it, theatrical folk? Whatever it is it, it good and progressive.

Think Arcade Fire with better harmonies and less noise.



6) Black Kids- Partie Traumatic: This generated a lot of noise prior to it’s release and probably didn’t live up to the hype, but it’s still very good.

Certainly has a dance feel to it, but enough elements of other stuff to not be too feminine. Just solid innovative pop songs.



7) Mates of State- Re-Arrange Us- I first discovered this band in 2004 when they opened a small smoke filled room for the strokes, at the time the wife of the husband/wife duo was about 8 months pregnant. Since then they’ve gained a bit of notoriety and cemented their indie cred.

Another great album, my only complaint would be they’re stuff tends to sound the same if you listen to a lot of it.

8) Santogold- Santogold: I’m pretty sure no one who knows me would expect me to like this album, but I do. It’s good.

A strange mixture of hip-hop, soul, indie and dance music. I think this girl is very talented and will probably make a impact in the future as well. The LES Artistes song might be the best single of the year and I’m being serious, try and find me a better song for the radio.



9) Mountain Goats- Heretic Pride: Solid album from indie rock veterans. Nothing outstanding and probably not their best work, but a very solid record none the less. Opening song is one of the 10 best of the year.



10) The Hold Steady- Stay Positive: Straight forward record from an American indie rock band. There is nothing earth shattering here, but it’s consistently good. I imagine this is what Randy Newman sounds like with a rock band behind him.